It’s Like Deja Vu: Five Things My Mom always Asks when I’m Home for the Holidays

Every time I head back to my parents I get to face the inevitable. I’m the “genius” of the family (apparently) because I have an affinity with computers and I kind of became the “handyman” because I was one of the few with the patience to read the manual or call tech support.

You might be able to see where this is going …

Upon arrival I’m almost always met with the same types of questions:

·  “Why is my computer so slow?”

·  “Can you rearrange the shed?”

·  “My phone is being weird!”

Go head … have a laugh.

Despite the fact that I generally always sit down and take mom and dad through the process of fixing these items, it never seems to stick (how I’d imagine it’s like raising a child, at times).

She always seems to say “wait, wait, waaaait, what was that you just did?” – something I can’t help since it’s generally basic tasks that she needs – so it got me thinking that it would be a good bit of humor (mixed with some helpful hints) if I did a post like this.

Usually I’d have a smart aleck remark when it comes to constantly getting asked for computer help. I’d usually refer people to lmgtfy.com (a funny little sitethat records the screen using Google to show how easy it is to find the information) but c’mon, this is my mom we’re talking about (so I had to bear yet another holiday of troubleshooting).

Five Things I’m Always Asked

Anyway … let’s all get a laugh (and some info) on these types of issues because I know some of you out there, reading this, are going to be in the same boat the next time you’re at your mom’s.

Q: Why is the computer so slow?

A: Lots of reasons, but it’s most likely that you’re clicking too many links or downloading things that are a bit sketchy. Next time, think before you download anduse a speed up guide for the computer instead of always asking me.

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Q: How did you keep the pounds off since I last saw you?

A: There’s really nothing to it other than eating better and trying to be active. The diet makes up the major factor in weight loss (or keeping it steady) so if you’ve got that, you don’t have to have a near heart attack running all the time.

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Q: Can you get that down for me?

A: I guess since I’m tall enough that’s okay, but it does beg the question of “why is it all the way up there in the first place?” Correct me if I’m wrong, but they did invent the thing called a ladder some time ago and there are smaller versions — like step ladders — that have come out too.

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Q: Can you rearrange the shed?

A: After such and such hours, a whole lot of sweat, and an aching – it’ll get done – always with the eventual “oh! that looks fantastic!” The real helper here, surprisingly enough, has been the game Tetris and its ability to help you understand structure.

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Q: Can you make my phone not so weird?

A: As if the computer wasn’t enough, right? This generally falls under the same thing of just downloading too many apps, connecting to shady websites, or not paying attention to permissions. A few disables, a quick install of Trend Micro Internet security for safe measures, and giving ‘em the know how when it comes to the app marketplace does the trick.

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Well, I guess it did come across as a little bit snarky, but I hope you had a laugh because the next holiday is right around the corner. You might as well brush up on some of these solutions to mom’s problems while you’re still ahead, right?

*photo credit: gruntzooki via photopin cc