I am feeling blah lately. Not really sure if it’s the fact that Thanksgiving has snuck up on me, or that Christmas is coming soon and I’m not at all prepared for either of them!
My Papa has been in hospice for the past few weeks at the VA Hospital. He is 79 and has been living at the Soldier’s and Sailor’s home for several years now. His health is finally failing him. It’s hard seeing my Mom and her siblings go through this awful time, but nice to hear her talk about how much she’s been enjoying spending so much time with him lately. It would truly be a miracle if he made it to his 8oth birthday on January 27th, of course you can never lose hope as long as there is life.
Maybe that’s what’s bugging me? Dad passed away on Dec 1st 2002. It’s getting closer every day. That day. This whole month. He was in the hospital for over a month, in ICU. It was awful. November is filled with memories of driving back and forth to the hospital to see him. Hopeful each time that perhaps he would wake up. Perhaps today would be the day that when he looked at me, I would truly know that HE was still in there. That he would tell me what to do. I still fight with these thoughts, always wondering if he knew I was there, if he KNEW it was me? I hope so.
On the upside of life, my son makes me so proud! He seems to have fairly clear ideas about what he wants to do in life. At age 14 I think that’s a pretty big accomplishment! He’s applying to for the Art & design for Business class at the Vo-Tech school for next year! I sent him and his dad to the open house last night (was feeling BLAH myself) and I’m so glad I convinced them to go. He was able to spend 25 minutes talking to his potential teacher who was impressed with his enthusiasm for art and drawing. She gave them a card with her personal email so he could send her a few example drawings, and then told him to be sure to get his application turned in asap! There are only 8 openings since the Vo-Tech takes students from around 11 or so area schools. I’m excited for him and happy he’s taking steps to follow his dreams!
This totally random, but can I just say how happy I was that Nicole won Wed.. on America’s Next Top Model!! I loved Laura’s down home sweetness but something about quirky Nicole made me root for her all season! Let’s hear it for the shy girls! YAY! Pie wanted Laura to win so she was a bit mad at me for cheering when Tyra announced the winner, lol. Loved this LA Times news article interview with Nicole! We love that show!
Mr.T.’s spending the night at a friend’s house tonight and my hubby and I are taking Pie to her girl scout party tonight. (Yes the hubs is going, I’m making him! He’ll have a buddy there so don’t feel sad for him!) Tomorrow Pi’s sending the night at a friend’s house and We’re picking Mr.T. up from his friends! I keep thinking to myself, wouldn’t it have been so completely awesome to have gotten rid of both kids at the same time if the kids would have both spent the night at a friend’s house on the SAME night!! Super Genius and I would have had to go out and do something so we wouldn’t just sit and stare at each other, lol. Someday!
Now that I’ve rambled on about my boring life I’m going to go try to get something done! I have reviews out the whazoo (and a few great giveaways) that I need to get written.
photo credit: engrish.com
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I understand those feelings. I hope your blah-ness passes soon and that you get the two occupied at the same time to do something fun!
Have a good weekend.
"I still fight with these thoughts, always wondering if he knew I was there, if he KNEW it was me? I hope so."
That's the same thought I had when I visited my grandpa when he was struggling with his life in the hospital few years back. That was the last time I saw him. Until now, I'm not sure if he knew I was there talking to him. I hope so too. I know that God told him I was there.